sexting

Amy Schumer Teaches Us All to Sext

July 30, 2015 by Vigdis Leave a Comment

The nuances of sexting can be more puzzling than solving labyrinth. Even if you read last week’s primer on how-to sext, you might still be thinking, “Wait, so what exactly should I say?”

And you’re not alone. Even the inimitable Amy Schumer has been struggling with that same question lately.

Okay, honesty moment: as hilarious as this clip is, we think it points out some serious flaws with typical sexting culture. First, that women’s pleasure doesn’t matter – which of course, it does! And second, that you can’t be true to yourself when sexting – and we think with the right partner you can.

Mayyyyybe Amy still has a little bit to learn, too – but we’d wager she actually just wasn’t in the right mood, (and we always recommend you want to be sexting before you start sexting).

If and when you do solve the labyrinth that is sexting though, the rewards are pretty sweet…

Sexting (A How-To)

July 28, 2015 by Vigdis 1 Comment

Googling “How to sext” directs you to more articles than if you Googled “Things to do in California.” Seriously, every major – and minor – culture publication has a cheeky guide giving you the do’s and don’ts of putting your texting habit to use…in order to please your partner.

And while we at O’a fully support a mutually beneficial sextship, we want to take a Jiminy Cricket role for a moment and say, “Don’t forget about your pleasure!”

Okay, now that we’ve got that reminder out there, let’s talk sexting best practices, helpful tips, just what the heck all those emojis mean, and more.

Make sure you have consent from your sexting buddy.

While, not all sexting relationships carry over into fooling around live and in person, both parties still need to give an emphatic “Yes!” to some virtual hanky-panky.

Eliciting a “Yes!” over text is a little more convoluted than when in person. Removing tone of voice and adding a little fear of the person on the receiving end might show their friends and laugh can make you want to skip asking – or sexting – all together.

Our advice? Ask anyway. Contextualize it – don’t just write, “Yo, wanna sext?” without a precursor. Ask how his day is going. Relate how his day is going to you helping him relax or make it better (with a winky face if the day is already going great). Then suggest a little virtual foreplay, saying straight out, “If you’re into it, I am.”

Grammar is sexy.

All those meme’s you’ve seen on Facebook aren’t lying – from AskMen to Vice, the advice is ubiquitous: how you spell in sexting matters.

Dirty talk is a-okay…so long as you stick to basic rules of spelling and remain coherent.

Which means that you must double check before clicking “send” – there’s nothing like an autocorrect moment to turn an exciting “I want you to rub my clitoris!” to “I want to rub my clothes!” – excitement lost!

The secret to great sext-worthy photos.

If a picture is worth a thousand words, you want to make sure all those words are capturing what you’re actually trying to say.

Sending photos while sexting is a personal choice. We aren’t going to go too deep into the debate because it’s all very individual and situation specific.

Check in with yourself to make sure you don’t feel pressured into it either; photos aren’t for everyone and this is about mutual excitement. So, if it doesn’t turn you on or makes you too anxious, use your words and try a detailed description of certain body parts. You might be surprised by just how powerful those words can be.

If you do say yes, make sure that you enter the field thoughtfully, cautiously and with deep trust in your partner. We highly recommend avoiding the face. It can help ease you into the experience and make you feel more confident about the anonymity of the sexy body pics.

A final note, if you do vote “yay” for sexy pics, remember the golden nude-photo rule: context is key. Showing just a picture of your nipple is less exciting for your partner (and for you!) as angling your camera up to capture the curve of your breast, your nipple, and hopefully your lips angling into a smile.

Psst. If you voted “nay” to taking some clothes off, we love the tips in this article from Wired. Learn to photograph “safe” body parts, like knees and fingers, in a sensual, teasing way.

What you must know about emoji: Eggplant = penis.

We are an image-driven culture; not just in how we look (we’ve been trying to reverse that one for awhile) but now in how we communicate, too. Of course, emoji are also all over sexting, but since Apple and Android are family friendly devices, adults have taken cartoon peaches and Ok-signs into an entirely different context.

As for if you should use emoji in your sexting? Plenty of people are doing it, so we say, if you think it’s cute and fun and turns you on, go forth and put that smiling whale in.

If you’re not quite sure about the whole eggplant/penis translation, we highly recommend Flirtmoji, which integrates into your phone and allows you send almost X-rated emoji to your virtual “lovah.”

Little white lies are okay.

We seriously love what Vice’s Sexting for Dummies had to say about this:

It hurts no one to make things up during a sexting sesh, and chances are they’re returning the favor anyway. Technology allows you to turn “Just woke up in the bus depot :-(” to “Ooh I just got out of a hot bath…” in seconds. Abuse this power.

Plus, almost assuredly, they’re doing the same fudging. If it’s more fun, then what’s the harm?

Team O’a members have indulged in the occasional sexting from the office to spice up a long day at work, and the barely there lingerie being described allowed for a shared mental picture (even if reality was a maxi skirt and muscle tank).

Finally and most importantly, write what turns YOU on.

One of the most important things you can do during sexting (and sex!) is engage in what makes you want to curl into a tiny ball of joy and then explode into a thousand fireworks.

Let sexting be flirty way to express yourself and your sexuality.

When you’re truly enjoying what you’re writing, it is conveyed to your partner, and they’ll respond with the same true pleasure.

Before initiating, take a moment to think about where your dirty thoughts might take you today. If you are invited to partake, don’t rush into the conversation, give your mind the chance to roam. Of course, the beauty of sexting is the instant communication, so by all means balance your caution with spontaneity and instinct (this gets easier with practice and a regular sexting buddy)! The most important thing of all is to have fun with it and see just how hot you can make that moment!

We want to hear from you!

Do you sext?
Let us know if you’re into it or not!
Have any tips or insights to share?
We would love to hear them, there’s always room to improve our sexting game!

Want Some Further Inspiration?

Check out a sext convo that one of our seriously saucy Pleasure Pledgers sent into us last month, our first installment of Adventures in Real Sexts.

Click HERE for Real Life Inspiration!

We were impressed by the combo of openness, playfulness, and HOTNESS (and her clever use of pictures only when and of what was comfortable for her!).

They follow most of the rules; and when grammar and autocorrect get in the way they acknowledge the silliness and move right back into the good stuff.

Hope you enjoy!

Don’t hesitate to send us one of yours, we will always respect your anonymity and privacy… but come on, you know some stuff is too good not to share!

One Night Stand Leads to Sexting Fun

July 27, 2015 by Christopher Neetz

Adventures in Real Sexts:

Check out a sext convo that one of our seriously saucy Pleasure Pledgers sent into us last month. We were impressed by the combo of openness, playfulness, and HOTNESS (and her clever use of pictures only when and of what was comfortable for her!). They follow most of the rules; and when grammar and autocorrect get in the way they acknowledge the silliness and move right back into the good stuff. Hope you enjoy!Names have been changed to respect the anonymity of these hot communicators.

Context: Mel (sexy lady) and Eduardo (seriously hot dude) met at a charming little pub. M was just in the city for a visit. After some intense weeks at work she was in serious need of a release…she had thought it would come in the form of a few good glasses of wine and some silly dancing. Then, a few drinks in but before dancing, M met E. It turned out that he was immediately into M and up for dancing and much more…

The next morning, M woke up with her head on E’s chest. She had a sudden understanding that her bag, which contained her phone and wallet, were no-where to be found. Rather than panic she ceased the moment, had more fun with E, and then used his laptop to email her friend about meeting up at a brunch spot around the corner. Whilst the women were brunching, E called M’s friend and left the sweetest message….He thanked M for the fun, apologized for having to leave her before she found her belongings (he had to go to a family reunion that morning!) and said to please have M call him to let him know she was okay.

M and her friend re-traced their whereabouts, snuck into the last dance spot they’ been at and recovered all of M’s items. It was one of those 24hrs stints that everything worked out just as it should have.

Here’s the texting that followed – enjoy!

The next morning/afternoon

M: Bag and all contents found!!

E: Yes!!!
Wow… Great news!!!
Other than that… What a fun evening and morning 🙂
Cheeks are sore from laughing

M: Great news and super fun indeed!

M: Aw, still tickled from your text. And realize that my cheeks are sore too. Hope you’ve had a great family reunion!

E: The rest of my body is a bit sore as well from spin on Thurs and sex last night and this morning…
Too bad you’re not sucking on me now… (wink)

M: Rest of me rather tired too (blush face)

E: Where are you? What are you wearing?

M: Having a nice little snooze. Don’t believe in pajamas.

E: When you going to suck on me again?

Next day:

M: Heading back from a day in the vineyards… But could be out for a another good glass before the week starts.

E: I have to do a bit of work now (sad face)
Otherwise I’d have you over for some wine

M: Fair enough, good luck w prepping for the week!

E: Stuck on hold for 20 minutes with United. UGH. We could have been squeezing in a session right now…

New day/evening:

E: How are you doing sexy??

M: Hey hey.
Damn. Was just around the corner from you but decided it was late and that I wouldn’t pester you

E: You should have. Have you had your orgasm for the day?? (blush face)

M: No!! No wonder I am so cranky today!

E: I’m sure my tongue and lips could have helped!!

M: Damn. I took myself for a glass near your place and came so close to popping into that pub we met at.

E: And I was so close to headed to the wine bar instead but ended up at the pub with a co-worker.

E: It felt great kissing you as I was inside of you (wink face)

M: Ugh!! Sorry to have just missed you by being at the place across the street…

M: And that made me smile too. You made a morning that could have been about a lost bag and a fuzzy head super delightful instead.

E: Why aren’t you sucking on me right now?? (blush smile)

M: Damn. Would have been fun to get a drink and some naughtiness in w you.

E: I should have come inside of you so you could feel a bit of my deep inside of you for the rest of the day… (wink)

M: That was on you if I recall correctly (wink)

E: Oh, I know…
I really wanted you to suck every last drop out of me as I came… The best!!

M: Now I’m all hot and bothered and I missed you by just a moment. Though I don’t know if I could have survived the blushing had you had to introduce me to a co-worker…

E: Haha
And have my throbbing cock in your mouth as I nibble your clit
You feeling my cock growing as your soft moist lips are wrapped around me
(blush face)
Tasting your sweetness as it melts in my mouth Mmmmm

M: Mmmmmm have gone back to the memory of sucking on you many times in the past few days… whilst I also pretend it’s your fingers sliding along my wet slit

E: Damn… I bet your sweet peach is nice and wet… Clit throbbing and swelling up.. Reaching out for my tongue or lips
Bend you over so I can lick your slippery wet pussy and tight sweet asshole from behind. Mmmm…
Spreading your legs so my tongue can dig for the sweetness
Do you enjoy the thought of sucking my hard cock?

M: Right now I am wildly impressed how hot your texting skills are and worried I’ll never get any rest
And yes
Sucking your cokck and knowing how much you like it turns me on massively

E: You will because I also need some rest
Stroking it as you lick and suck on my nicely shaved balls.. Your pussy melting all over my mouth Mmm
Licking the droplets of my precum with the tip of your tongue Mmm
Eagerly asking you to cum in my mouth… Begging you Mmm

M: I want you to be licking on my tits and rubbing my clit and then flying me so hard but so sweetly
(hehehe, autocorrect turns fucking into flying)

E: I’ll suck on one nipple and tit while you do the other one
Then spin you around and fuck you from behind as you watch yourself being pleased in my full length closet mirrored doors
Sliding my thumb in your tight ass as I pound you slow but hard and deep from behind
Damn, I’d love to see how wet your pretty soaked pussy looks right now Mmmmm

M: She’s both very pleased and very teased

E: Mmm
What would you really want me to do if I were there?

Next morning

M: I fell asleep and woke up dripping wet… have a good day handsome

E: Wow.. Were you pleasing yourself when you fell asleep…
What are you doing naughty girl?

M: Just finished some solo naughtiness actually… Now off to write a report. Think it’s a good ordering of events.

E: Mmmmm should have let me know so I could have helped you before heading out (wink)

M: You did help out (blush)

E: haha
How did I help out??

M: Good memories…

E: So you like my texting skills??
haha
What memories made you wet?
Also, you are a total sweetheart… to me.

M: Aw, Seriouslys, aw. Thank you

E: Want to have you cum in my mouth soon (blush)

M: I’m down with that (wink)

E: Have you ride and fuck my mouth until you cum Mmmm

M: I’m trying to complete a work report on deadline!!
But damn, that sounds gooooood

E: Nibble on your clit

E: Hello?

M: Hey hey:) I had to turn off the phone to write this proposal! Due in two hours..

E: 2 hours? Fk them!!

M: Aren’t you watching a boxing thing or something?

E: It’s on later… Still want me to cum deep inside of you?

Too bad you’re not here… I’m stroking my hard throbbing cock thinking of the way you rode it Mmmm

M now back home (several thousand miles away from E)

M: Oh I want you HERE

E: Is that right?? For what??

M: I want you in my bed fucking me, clearly! “I’m stroking my hard throbbing cock thinking of the way you rode it Mmmm” I’m now so wet I can barely stand it

E: Spread your legs and show me where you want my hard cock
I’ll grab you by the ankles and spread your legs wide as I suck on your pulsating clit with my soft lips
Sliding 2 fingers in and out as I lick your clit

M: Woke up to these then came sooooo good when thinking of your tongue and fingers… And cock

E: You should be sucking on my hard thick cock right now… what are you wearing?

M: That got me so hot and bothered that I had to take a break from errands and get back in bed…

E: Let me see a quick picture… Please…

M: Maybe later… If your good….

E: I’ve been very good

M: True and I’m the one who mis-spelled you’re.. So…
But I’m back to errands… What are you hoping for?

E: Something naughty

(M sends face and nothing else selfies)

M: Yum Can I see those gorgeous tits and amazing pussy please????
Is this after you came?
When are you back so I can cum in your wet pussy?
You’ll have to suck every last drop of my cum after I explode in you…
Deal?

M: Not sure when I’m back, but deal…

E: What are you doing?

M: Just opened a good bottle of red and about to sip it while thinking of you rubbing my clit

E: Nibbling your clit as you suck my cock
Show me your clit

M: (sends pic of tits in very low cut bright pink tank top)
Shit… My tits are even turning me on;)

E: Stroking my cock for you right now
When I see you we will just fuck forevvverhh
Wow

E: How is your pretty pussy? I’m stroking my hard throbbing cock while looking at your pictures…

M: My pretty pussy is missing you

E: Oh really… Are you rubbing it?
Let me see it
I need a couple more pics please

M: (sends rather suggestive pics of torso and a hand slipping under the covers)

E: Yummm Let me see your nipples
Imagining me licking your wet pussy?
With my hard cock in your mouth

M: (sends a faceless pic of her grabbing a breast)

E: Mmm Where would you want me to cum if I were there

M: Fuck. I want you to want me and to have you cum all over me

E: Mmm Fuck your pretty mouth while I tease and pinch your erect nipples
Watch you lick off the dops of my precum with your tongue
I came 3 times this morning Mmmm
What are you doing to your pussy?

M: I want to make you come like that in the morning…
I’m turned on but not as wet as I would be if you were here
Licking me…

E: Watching yourself in my mirrors as I lick your pussy with your legs up in the air and spread wide open

M: Yes. Yes please!

E: Then I’d put you on your knees as I’m standing… Watching yourself in my mirror sucking on my hard cock like a naughty and good girl

M: Sorry for delay… took me a minute to come to that

E: Mmmm

M: I like when you grab my knees and ankles

E: And pound your pussy
Nice and deep

M: Mmmm

E: your legs on my shoulders as I kiss and suck on your lips and nipples
What else really drives you crazy?
Like me squeezing your throat with my hands a bit?

M: My throat is a bit tender but I do like the idea of you taking control and having your way with me

E: Flip you over and shove the head of my throbbing cock in your tightness Mmmm

A few days later

E: At the pub we met at
What you wearing??

M: Favorite outfit…

Also would feel so much better w your throbbing hard cock inside me… Yes, I want that…

E: Let me see what outfit you’re wearing
Bend you over.. Pulling your hair and spanking your ass
Then have you such on my hard cock before shoving it back inside you

M: My damn phone… Been trying to show you how much I want you but it’s not recording…

E: Show me your beautiful nipples and wet pink pussy where you want me to cum

M: (Sends pic of her face as she was coming)

E: What are you doing to your wet pussy?

M: Imagining your cock in me
Thrusting and pounding
And surprising me w so much hard and powerful goodness

E: Your legs on my shoulders, going deeper and deeper
My hands wrapped around your neck and you hold onto my triceps. Then wrists
Let me see how wet your pussy is

M: God, your triceps…
And deeper
Pinning my wrists back

E: Pinning you down and doing whatever I want to you

M: My pussy is dripping

E: Let me see
I’d pull my cock out of your dripping wet pussy to fuck your mouth as you’re still pinned
Stroking my hard cock right now

M: So many tried photos of my sopping pussy and hard as fuck nipples

E: Mmmm

M: But it’s dark and I’m all riled up
And my phone is driving me nuts and is not letting me capture it
But I’m writhing

E: Mmmmmm

M: And just want you to take charge

Following late morning

E: What are you wearing? (blush)
What are you doing hottie?

M: Just woke up from a nap… Jeans around my ankles…;)

E: Mmmm wish my cock were in your sweat soaked pussy

M: Mmmmm yes yes yes

E: Kissing you and pounding your pussy…
Still craving my cum in your pretty pink pussy?

M: Soooooooooo much

E: Only if you promise to suck the last drops out…
If you were here I’d make sure you’d also have some of my cum inside you Mmmmm

M: I promise (blush face)

E: Send me a naughty pic

M: Patience…

E: Why?

M: Cause I like thinking of you waiting impatiently….

E: Naughty girl
You’re going to get spanked hard for that
Or you can picture me stroking my hard cock to your pictures…
What panties are you wearing right now?

M: Um… Nada. And I may be a bit naughty at times but I never lie

E: Let me see naughty girl
How many times have you played with your pretty pink pussy today?

M: Twice
As you know, I get frisky when I wake up…

E: I played twice as well
It felt great when you were on top of me Mmmmm
Turned on even more when you wanted me to cum inside of me even though you’re not on the pill
How many times did you cum?

M: I’m pretty tuned into my cycle… Just couldn’t express that in the that moment…
I honestly can’t remember… And that is a very very good thing

E: Why is that a very very good thing?
Do you remember sucking on me? That also felt damn good

M: Because it was too high of a number, I lost count
I do…

E: Wish you were sucking on me right now
Cock is throbbing for you right now
Send me a little something naughty please

M: (sends selfie raising a glass of wine to him) Out having a glass whilst working but still hope this helps

E: Out and about with no panties
Can’t wait to fuck your wet pussy out in public soon… Find a dark alley or something (blush)

M: Out and about w no panties… Don’t tell!

E: I dare you to rub your clit next time you’re in the restroom

M: If I do that, I might not be able to stop

E: And??
Bite your lip and think of me

M: I might have to go the restroom just to do this… I have to work!!!

E: It’s Saturday!!
I would be so turned if someone were watching you suck on me.. Then I’d bend you over so they can watch you cum over and over (blush face)
Dare you!!
Be a good girl and do as you are told!
blush face
That’s what naughty girls get for leaving the house with no panties…
Stroking my hard cock thinking of you rubbing your throbbing clit Mmmmm

M: Wondering if my computer is safe enough for me to leave it here to go to the bathroom…
Rub and think of my sucking and slurping and loving having you so hard and desiring of my mouth

E: Fucking your mouth
The head of my cock going into your throat

M: Do it
My pussy is throbbing against my jeans

E: Tighten your pussy and imagine me being in it
I’d love to bend you over and fuck your wet pussy as I slide my thumb in and out of your ass Mmmm
Going to tie your hands behind your back and do whatever I want to you (blush face)

M: Fuck me!!!!!!

E: Make your pretty pussy explode all over my cock!

M: I want to ex…… ploooooooooode!!!!!

E: Me too…. Where would you want me to explode??

M: In me (because you said that’s what felt the most amazing to you…)
And I like making you feel amazing

E: And what makes you feel amazing?

M: Honestly… Depending on the moment, you powerfully fucking me from behind.. and aslo you lapping up my juices with your talented lips and tongue
But I also love getting your cock throbbing in my mouth

E: Mmmmm
I can picture licking your pussy lips and clit very eagerly and begging you to cum in my mouth (blush)

M: (sends picture of the “washroom” sign in the restroom)
did as I was told
And can picture that too… And did twice today… And suspect thrice rather soon…

E: Mmmm
Take a couple of naughty pics for me
I need proof! (wink)
Get any work done??? Haha

M: More than I would have thought considering I had this hottie from the East Coast turning me on all afternoon…

E: Hahaha
Did you play or tease yourself in the restroom?
wink

M: Both

Next morning

E: You please yourself yet this morning? (blush face)
When do I get to cum in your wet pussy?

M: No soon enough…

E: Where are you right now?
I’m craving to hear your voice as we cum…

M: I’m in bed… Wish I’d just recorded myself…

E: Want to play again?
I’m stroking my cock

M: Yes, but I’m still recovering and I have a business call starting now!!!!
Stroke it and think of me sucking you

E: Postpone it for really good phone sex

M: Tempting… !
But sadly I can’t

E: Or send me a naughty pic so I can cum looking at it
I’d love to see your pretty pink satisfied pussy
You’re going to have to suck every last drop out of me for not doing as you’re told (blush face)

M:…..

E: When did you last suck a real man dry??

M: Yours was the last cock in my mouth

E: Have you had another cock in your pussy since?
The truth

M: Nope
I swear

E: Just a fantasy but I’d love to have someone watch you suck on my hard throbbing cock Mmmmm
Imagine my hard cock in your wet pussy… Your legs on my shoulders as I pound you hard
Show me your pussy nice and wet as you’re on your call…

M: I’m at a cafe now..

E: Well… you know what that means (blush)
Go to the bathroom and take off your panties
And send me a pic of them

M: (no pic sent) Haha.. I’m going to be in so much trouble the next time I see you…

E: Trouble? Haha
You’re going to be my hot submissive girl day and night (blush face)
I have a blindfold and tie I want to use on you (blush face)

M: I’m nervous, but in (blush face)

E: Does your pussy get wet thinking about being submissive to me?? (blush face)
What naughty things would you like to try with me?

M: I want you to tie me to the bed and tell me to stay still…
And then have you make that impossible

E: Going to have to cover your mouth too
I can picture teasing and eating your pussy forever… Ice cubes… Pinching and slapping your amazing tits and ass
Rubbing my hard hard cock and shaved balls all over your body… especially your face…
Taking pictures and video of it on your phone so you can watch when you’re at home

M: Sounds rather memorable…!
And amazing.. And now I’m going to have to go home sopping wet…

E: Send me a picture of that wet pussy now… Do as you are told and go to the bathroom

M: I like keeping you wanting….

E: Well… You’re going to be punished for that! And by punished I mean utterly delighted….

Next day

E: And how’s your day been?

M: Big meeting in 20min, don’t distract me!
(Had to take a lunch break to further imagine your blind fold offer… )

E: Hahahahaha
Ok I’ll behave only this once!! I’ll be a really good boy (blush face)

M: Good (blush face)

E: I think that in itself deserves a reward
How did it go?

M: You get a reward
I missed dinner…

E: Why?
How was your lunch ‘break’?

M: Break was delightful and thank goodness for it

E: And what did you do and think about?

M: My dinner/ your cock

E: What about my cock?

M: It’s what I thought about at lunch and wanted for dinner….

E: What would you do with my cock if you had it right now?

M: I just keep remembering how dizzy I was when I woke up on you and yet how much fun I had going straight to your cock…

E: What did you enjoy about my cock?
It’s nice and hard right now
What are you wearing?

M: Low cut blue dress

E: Mmm
Let me see

M: (Sends pic of her from lips to upper torso)

E: I want to cum on those amazing tits
Let me see your beautiful nipples
Or that pretty pink wet pussy
PLEASE
How is your pretty pussy this evening?

M: Just read through this chain and everything is throbbing

E: blush face
How far back did you read?

M: All the way..
Why on Earth did I bother doing other things when I could have just spent that time at your place…

E: wink
Could have sent you off full of my cum

M: Right?! Damn… And I remember being at the wine bar thinking, “wish he and his cock would walk in and say sweet nothings and then fuck me too.”

E: And I was across the street
Haha
Show me a few more naughty pics

M: (Sends a selfie blowing a kiss)
Night night

E: Naughtier

M: (Sends a selfie lying back in bed)

E: You going to play with yourself now before going to sleep
Or did you already?

M: A little bit of both
I got mad at you earlier… Mad that you didn’t make sure to fuck me again before I left your city…
That’s why you didn’t get a better pic of my tits tonight…;)

E: Well…
I’m still keeping you wet and horny
wink face

M: That’s true… Very very true
And truthfully I couldn’t stay mad at you

E: I think I deserve pictures of your beautiful tits, nipples and pussy…

M: You probably do… night night